My Saint Patrick

My Godparents- Pat Gallagher and Cindy Kohart

In my family St. Patrick's Day is a big deal.  Not only is it a celebration of everything Irish, but it was my Uncle Pat's birthday.  Uncle Pat was my Godfather and half of my cousin's too.  He was a good guy.  A really good guy.  He had nicknames for all of us.  I was Muggsy or Muggs for short.  He said because when I was a baby I would punch the air like a prize fighter.  I can't remember if Graham or Kevin was MadDog, but the name fits either of them actually.  Uncle Pat read more than anyone I knew.  He was a total history buff and knew so much about the Civil War and World War II.  He loved all things Irish.  He was into ancestry way before Ancestry.com.  He wrote letters to the post office in Ireland to find some of our relatives and he succeeded.  He mapped out the family tree and went to the library (his favorite place) and made us all copies.  My kids will have no problem going back several generations if they ever have to do a school project.  He was a Vietnam Veteran, and the war was very hard on him.  Not physically, but emotionally.  He never really talked about it, but the pain was always there.  You could see it.  He had the kindest heart.  He always remembered my kids at Christmas and I always appreciated his gifts more because I knew he was on a fixed income.  He really connected with Owen for some reason.  They were about as different as two people could be.  Pat was kind of quiet and calm while Owen, well ...  He rarely traveled far from home but he went to Arizona to see my Aunt Bonnie and all along the way he sent Owen postcards.Owen loved getting those in the mail and still keeps them in his bedside table.  I will never forget the last time I saw him.  We were at my mom's for a visit and he was over and so excited about his trip to one of the Dakota's ( North I think).  He was going to ride the train and meet up with his regimen from Vietnam.  I believe it was the first reunion he was going to attend.  I don't think I ever remember him being so excited about something.  When he got up to leave I gave him a hug and told him  to have a great time.  He started to cry which made me cry too.  I am not sure why he cried.  Maybe he knew.  Who knows.  All I know is I miss seeing him sitting in the chair at family events.  I miss listening to him talk to me about civil war history.  I miss him calling me Muggs.  I am pretty sure he is hanging out in heaven listening to a Celtic Reel reading a Civil War book.  Grandma probably made him some Corned Beef and Cabbage (the best in the world, BTW).  He is most definitely wearing green.

Happy Birthday Uncle Pat!!!!  Love Muggsy

Driving Mr. Graham

I feel like Morgan Freeman but instead of Miss Daisy I am driving Master Graham.  I have been driving around for four weeks with this huge picture of him.  It is his Senior Picture from 1993 that the photographer used as a sample.  I love how it shows how serious and intense Graham is.  I find the shadow particularly interesting.  The shadow looks as if he is sitting on the pot talking on the phone which he has been known to do when I call him.  The worst is when I didn't know that is what was going on and then I hear the flush.  Anyway,  Saddler's Photography sadly shut down this year and they put out an announcement that you could come and get the samples.  I hated to think of him being thrown in the trash (this is a sign of how much I have grown in 40 years), so I made an appointment to go pick him up.  I left him in the car so I wouldn't forget to take him to my mom's when I go at Easter, but got sick of him falling all over my groceries and such so now he sits in my dining room on the bench with the rest of the stuff that I just can't find a place for yet.  I am thinking of auctioning to the highest bidder and the money could go to the charity of Graham's choice.  If I forget to take it to my mom's at Easter that is definitely what I am going to do.  Where does the bidding start for a wicked cool picture of a hipster before hipster's were cool?  Maybe I will just keep it and put it back in the car to help keep me company on long drives.

Snow Days

I am not a fan of snow.  Proof is that I looked all through my photos and this is the only one I could find that was of me outside in the winter.  I am sure my grandmother took this photograph.  She took the most god awful photos of me.  I am always in a ridiculous position.  Never gave any warning.  Just started snapping.  To make matters even worse, she would have doubles or triples printed and give them to me.  Anyway, that is a story for another day.  Snow.  Not. A. Fan.  Sure, I love to ski, but I don't fall.  I am not a fantastic skier, but I really stay in my comfort zone and if I fall, I am done.  TO THE LODGE!!!  I like to sled.  One time.  Walking back up that hill is for the birds.  Especially all bundled up and feeling like the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man.  One and done and I am good.  The older I get the more my disdain grows.  My kids had over 3 weeks of snow days last year.  Who needs that stress???!!!!

But alas we are in the middle of our biggest snow event in several years.  The Blizzard of '92 kept me from the Adam Ant concert.  The Blizzard of '98 ruined my moving plans.   Now we name our winter storms- this one is called Jonas  and it is particularly annoying as it is taking several days to pass.  Because my New Year's Resolution is to try and find the good in things I tried to remember some good times that I had during some snowstorms.

Sometime in the '80s.  Location Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio.  The "forest" next to Heather's house.  I remember we walked around and pretended it was our Winterland.  I am sure it seemed much bigger than it actually was, but every time I see trees with those icy drops covered with a dusting of white fluffy snow I go back there.

Also in the 80's, many different times, sledding at Valley Vista.  Now that I live in the mountains I chuckle at how big I thought that hill was.

1988- We moved to Bristol.  Stayed at the hotel where Elvis stayed until our furniture got here.  Got ready for first day of school only to arrive and find school was cancelled because it might snow.  WTH???  I have been here almost 30 years and am just now getting used to that one.

Blizzard of '92.  Was supposed to go see Adam Ant with Rachel in Atlanta.  Cancelled because of weather.  Nooooooo!!!!  Rachel tries to leave Atlanta and gets stuck in one of the worst traffic jams of all time.  (I am pretty sure this is the same traffic jam that brought my friend Tracey together with her husband.  They may be the only people in the world who are fond of that traffic jam.)  Tried to make the best of missing the concert so I played Stripped over and over (much to the disdain of my friends) and found some friends to help me drown my sorrows.  Problem is every store on the The Strip ran out of beer.  Oh no!!!  Never fear- there's always liquor.  Tequila doesn't make your clothes fall off when you are playing outside in a blizzard, but it does make you feel that sledding down The Hill on a cafeteria tray is a good idea.  It was really fun, but flying off the hill over the wall and onto the street can leave one with a gigantic bruise on one's ass cheek.

Blizzard of '96.  Decided to get snowed in at my mom's with some friends.  Best place to get snowed in.  All sorts of tasty treats, most likely with dill at that time, and really fun board games.  Playing Taboo or Win Lose or Draw with my mom is a total hoot!!  My favorite memory of this storm is sledding down Bellebrook Dr on those exercise slides that came out about the same time as step aerobics.  We are talking Clark Griswold super secret spray fast.

Snow Day January 2010.  Sledding at the Campbell's.  This picture makes me smile.  Nothing like sledding on a plastic.  PS- this is the same plastic you use for Redneck Slip n Slide at the Campbell's.

  So as I finish Day 1 of being snowed in I have a new attitude.  I will enjoy Day 2 of Winter Storm Jacob.  I may go build a snowman or make a snow angel.  Or I may stay in my pajamas and binge watch all the British dramas that I can't get enough of on Acorn.  One thing is for sure- I will thank God that I don't live any further north and have to do this more often.

Liam vs. The Sprouts

Man v Food

I really love Thanksgiving. It isn't as stressful as Christmas. It is all about being with family and friends and I have some really good memories that came from this holiday. If Thanksgiving is at my parents it is always a full blown affair.  Now that we all live far apart even more so.  Graham and I generally try to make it to Mom and Dad's every other year for Thanksgiving and the alternate years for Christmas. While we are there we try and cram in as much family time as possible. And in our family, family time means big dinners.  We generally have so many people that we cannot all fit at one table.  Generally in situations like these people fight to not have to sit at the kid's table, but once all of us kids grew up we now get upset if we have to sit with the grown ups. This was the case a few years ago.  We were having a huge dinner and I was at the grown up table. Now don't get me wrong, I had a wonderful time.  I got to sit with my lovely godmother whom I rarely get to see.  I always enjoy  dining with my aunt's and uncle's too.  But something was going on in the other room and I couldn't figure out what it was and it was killing me.  Lily and Owen had their own table and the disturbance was not coming from them. The commotion was from the next table over where my brother, and his wife Hye, Vanessa, Jason and his wife Jess, and Liam were sitting.  At the time Liam was an extremely picky eater.  I wasn't there but I sure the conversation went something like this. One of the "adults" asks Liam why there is only mashed potatoes and turkey on his plate. He says something like that is all he wanted.  Then they gang up on him and tell him he should try new things.  Then they start in on the "We never had a choice when we were kids.  Our parents would make us eat things we didn't like."  Liam wasn't budging until somebody, probably Ness, says "I bet he'd eat Brussel sprouts if somebody paid him". Graham threw down the gauntlet. $20. Somebody else up'd the ante to $30. He had to eat 20 bites. Jess had prepared some lovely roasted sprouts which were cut in half.  There was much cheering and chanting and he ate them all. When I found out later what had happened I was pretty proud of Liam.  Getting my brother to cough up cash like that is next to impossible.  I like to tell myself that he learned a valuable life lesson that day.  Sure my cousins and and brother were feeding the sense of entitlement that kids have theses days.  Won't do anything unless something is in it for them.  But really what Liam learned was if you get just the right amount of wine and beer in my family you can make them do anything.

CB's

Breaker Breaker this is Nutmeg calling for the Silver Fox.  You got your ears on Silver Fox?  How about the Heisey lady?  Good.  Yes, this is Nutmeg heading up the turnpike with The Medicine Man, Rag Doll and the Little Cracker.  We just passed a Smokey.  Hope he catches that Fighter Pilot that is about to cause a pileup.  Need us to stop and get some bread for dinner to go with the spaghetti.  Copy that.  Catch you in a few.  10-4

Until I went to college I assumed that all families communicated via CB's.  Not sure why I didn't put it together that most people didn't have the CB sitting on the counter in the kitchen or have them mounted in their cars, but I didn't think we were different than anybody else.  In my Food Science class at UT my lab partner assured me that we were not the norm.  I think we were using nutmeg as a spice when I told him that was my handle.  He couldn't wait to hear more so I told him the families names.  I ran into him this weekend and he still couldn't let it go.    

Grandpa- Silver Fox

Uncle Kyle- Gray Fox

Grandma- Heisey Lady

Minnow (known only to those who didn't really know her as Muriel)- The Little Fish 

Dad- The Medicine Man.  I mean he was a Pharmacist right

Mom- The Rag Doll

Graham- The Little Cracker.  

We would talk to each other on the one hour trip to and from Lorain.  Telling each other our "20" and when we think we would arrive.  We would listen to it to see how traffic was and to try and avoid the speed traps.  When we were at Grandma's the CB on the counter was also a scanner so we would listen to that for fun or to find out what the sirens were for.  

I think we were just ahead of our time really.  It was before cell phones so it was a good way to communicate on the road.  But even better you got to socialize with people you didn't really know. Mostly truckers which might explain my potty mouth.  You never saw their faces but for a few brief moments you interacted with somebody and listened to what they had to say.  If you didn't like it, you turned the channel.  Sometimes people shared too much and sometimes they told lies.  I think I just discovered that the CB was really the first Social Media.  

Well, I need to take a 10-200 and get another 100 Mile Coffee so I am signing off.  10-4

My Dad and Value

I am a Pricing Manager.  Most people don't have a clue what that means.  Sometimes I don't either, but basically my job is to set the prices for the products that my company makes.  I spend most of my time buried in data in spreadsheets.  I am one of those geeks that gets really excited when I learn how to do a new function in excel.  When I am not geeking out on my computer I am trying to educate everyone about value.  We all know from business school that people are willing to pay more for a product.  Sometimes that value is real and sometimes it is perceived.  Last week I had the opportunity to give a presentation at our Annual Sales Meeting. While I was giving my presentation it hit me that I had really been training for this job my whole life because I was Greg Little's daughter.  It is not an easy task to get Greg Little to part with a dollar.  I am not going to say that my dad is cheap, but my mom used to say that he was such a tight ass that if you put a piece of coal between his butt cheeks it would turn into a diamond.  I remember one time driving to Click on State Road to get light bulbs.  We walked around that whole store and dad was convinced that their prices were too high so we got back in the car and drove a few miles down the road to Gold Circle.  We saved a nickel on the light bulbs.  He was so proud.  Dad spent the beginning of his career in Pharmacy as a Director of Pharmacy but it was a natural fit when he moved into  Materials Management and Procurement.   I would have hated to been one of those guys calling on him.  Now, I have to say that Dad is always looking for a deal but he doesn't mind to pay a little more for something he feels has good quality and will last a while.  He has worn the same style of Sperry Topsiders for over 20 years.  He gets a new pair about every couple of years and the old pair becomes the weekend shoe for working around the house and yard.  You can tell how old the shoes are by the different colors of paint that are splattered on them.  (My mom likes my dad to remodel so they paint a lot.)  He has a Tilley hat that he loves mostly because it comes with a lifetime warranty.  Don't get me started on the beer.  I have a hard time seeing the value in an $8 bottle of beer.  When he buys something, he is going to buy something that lasts because he will keep it and use it forever.  A good thing when it comes to tools, a bad thing when it comes to polyester leisure suits that he would still wear today if my mom wasn't there to stop him.  So anyway, I learned from an early age that if I wanted Dad to buy something I would have to sell him on the value and that was not an easy sell.  I found out I was in good company when I was in college and had to have surgery.  I think it was surgery #3 so I knew what to expect but this time was a little different.  I knew many of the doctor's in town because Mom and Dad both worked with them and I got passed around as a babysitter through the Bristol Anesthesia Group so I knew them very well.  Dr. Smith was going to be the lucky one to put me under this time and I think he left me awake just a little longer than usual so he could make a point.  He looked down at me with his mask on and held up a vial of medicine.  He said "See this drug Meghan?  This is the drug that your dad says is too expensive.  This is the drug that will help you feel better and when you wake up you won't feel hungover.  So when you wake up and don't feel as bad as you did the last time you make sure you tell your dad".  Pretty sure that Dr. Smith would have been a really good salesman and pretty sure that Dad reevaluated his position on the value of that med.

Liam

Eighteen years ago I was miserable.  A doctor told me (mistakenly) that I would most likely have problems getting pregnant so I should start my family in my twenties and not wait.  He told me it could take years to get pregnant.  I was very career oriented and I knew that you were "supposed" to have a family, but I don't think I had that longing that some women have to have a baby.   Well, I decided to just let nature take it course and maybe in a few years I would be a mom.  Ten months later here I was.  It was three days before my due date.  I was hot, I was contracting, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't sleep and I was scared out of my mind.  I knew that once this baby came out my life would change forever and no longer be my own, but at that point I didn't care.  My friends would go walking with me in the evenings with the hope of bringing on labor but nothing was working. Then Will Campbell called.  Uncle Will, as we affectionally call him, was going to make this baby come out one way or another.  He called and said "we are walking at Steele's Creek today Meg".  We walked what felt like 10 miles and then went back to his house for lunch.  I drank a half gallon of kool-aid (the Campbell's always had kool-aid) and he made Country Style Steak and Gravy.  That did it.  Labor came a few hours later and with the help of friends and family after pushing for two hours I was a mom.

I'd like to say that I was the best mom in the world, but I don't think I was.  I suffered from post-partum depression but nobody really talked about it then so I suffered in silence.  I think motherhood is harder for control freaks.  I was the one who was always in control, but not now.  I did ok when people were around, but when it was just the two of us I didn't know what to do with him.  With the help of a pacifier and a swing we eventually got into a groove. My friend Diane calls the early stages of infancy the pupa stage and I think this is spot on.  I did much better once Liam actually started to do and notice things.

I think looking back over the years what amazes me most is not how much Liam has changed, but how much he has stayed the same.  The first time my friend Torie saw Liam she commented that he was an old soul and I agree.  Even when he was a toddler he acted like a forty year old man.  He would stand and raise his arm with his index finger extended and proclamate his thoughts.  When he was cast as the Mayor of Munchkin Land in the Wizard of Oz we felt it was a typecast.  He has always been headstrong.  A trait that I admire, but is difficult to deal with as a parent.  The toddler years were a little rough at times, and I think I would just like to forget most of his transition through puberty.

School was always interesting.  At his first parent/teacher conference in preschool the teachers sat us down and told us how bright he was and felt he was very intelligent, but they expressed their concerns about the fact that Liam did not like to color.  Hmmm- at his conference last year the English teacher told me how bright he was and expressed her concern at how he didn't like to do his homework.  Somehow we have made it through and unless something drastic happens he will be graduating with an advanced diploma in the spring.  He is even considering a career in teaching, which I think is a testament to all of his teachers over the years.

I could go on and on with stories as all parents can, but instead I would like to use this time to thank all of you who have helped form Liam into the young man that he is today.  To my husband- Thank you for stepping in and teaching Liam how to be a good responsible man.  To my parents- saying Thank You for everything isn't enough, but Thank You.   To any of you who have babysat, carpooled or supervised sleepovers- Thanks.  To any of you who have listened to me vent when things were out of control- Thank you.  To anyone who has shared wine with me- Thank you.   To his teachers- Thank You.

But most of all- Thank You Liam.  I know I was not always the perfect parent, but I hope you won't have to pay for too many years of therapy to fix what I did wrong.  You taught me how to put someone else's needs before my own.  You taught me how to have unconditional love.  You taught me how to control the things you can, but to just let go of the things you can't.  You taught me how to be a mom and that is the best thing in the world.